Change – It’s all in the Mind

Sometimes when you initiate a change, you find the motivation drying up very fast. You are not able to sustain the same zeal and enthusiasm that you had started with. There is something within you which is pulling you back, and not letting you proceed.

How to remain enthusiastic?  

Enthusiasm comes with clarity of mind and purity of intent behind the act. You feel enthusiast when the mind can see the result, and the heart has a pure intent. If there is some malicious intent, unhealthy comparison or any negative external trigger that is motivating you the zeal won’t last. Anything negative is tiring, by nature. It seeps your energy from inside. Whenever you feel you have lost your enthusiasm, sit with yourself and look at the intent closely. Ask yourself, why do you want to change? What is the purpose? Is it to show somebody down, prove something to somebody or show off? Or is there a deep rooted desire to change? Envision yourself as a changed person, and feel it without any negative and malicious intent. This clears all the blockages in the mind and you feel the spark once again.

Dos & don’ts of self-talk?

Self-talk plays a very important role in enthusiasm. We all have been doing it. Now let’s explore how to do it.

Suppose you resolve to wake up early, and you set an alarm. When the alarm goes off, your subconscious mind gives you some excuse and you go back to sleep. You feel bad once you wake up, but can do nothing about it. Next day the same excuse puts you down.

Any change comes with determination. As soon as the alarm goes off in the morning there are two voices inside. One which tells you to go back to sleep and one which tells you to wake up. The voice which wins decides your action. If you are determined that come what may I will wake up, you win.

Determination is the key to success. Apart from this check your self-talk.

Self-talk is a conversation you have with yourself. There are some rules of this conversation, which can help you keep your positive intent powerful and assertive

  • Never ever talk to the self in derogatory terms. Even if you feel horrible about yourself, don’t tell yourself that you are bad. Whatever you tell yourself, is very deeply accepted by you inner conscience, and then inner conscience keeps telling you the same for a very long time. If you tell yourself that you are a loser, this gets reaffirmed by the sub-conscious mind and sticks to you. Example never ever tell yourself that you cannot wake up early. Even if you fail to wake up don’t discourage yourself. As this slowly impact your confidence levels. Have a self-motivating conversation with yourself. Encourage your inner self, just as you encourage others
  • Don’t push your subtle thoughts under the carpet. Don’t avoid or fight these thoughts. Listen to them closely and have a conversation. Give reasoning and educate it. Spend time listening to your inner child and pamper it if needed. Spending time on paying attention to it is a very healthy investment.
  • Be honest with your You may be able to trick the whole world, but not your own self. So don’t give yourself some excuses or smart pushovers
  • Practise silence at least 20 minutes a day. It is the best investment you can make.
  • Be aware of what you are feeding yourself with through your sense organs. Whatever you see or hear, whether it is a film, or a real life scene it is being absorbed without you noticing it. So be sure, you input positive and inspirational information
  • Respect yourself. Ego and self-respect are two different things. Normally people avoid respecting the self, because they do not understand the difference between both. Self-Respect is a state when you respect the self and you respect the others too, whereas ego is the state where you feel yourself superior or inferior to others.
  • Whenever you make a mistake or do not keep up to the promises you make, you feel guilty. People often think that guilt, criticism and demeaning the self is the right way of mending a mistake. Not feeling guilty is arrogance. This is not true. Guilt causes dejection which leads to failure as you stop making efforts. The actual moment of failure happens when one is not able to get out of the feeling of guilt. Right way of dealing with mistakes is to replace guilt with introspection. Mistakes need to be taken as stepping stones to success. Agreed! This needs a powerful frame of mind. It comes from honesty and having a strong connection with The Almighty.   

 

How to change some very old hard habits?

Sometimes, you are challenged with some deep and hard habits. You fail to change them despite putting in lots of effort and this creates a feeling of helplessness and anxiety. What does one do?

 Nothing, absolutely nothing is permanent in this world. The only difference among soft and hard habits is the time and energy required to make the change. Hard habits need persistence, patience and maturity. When you are going through a very difficult phase, you just need to stay there and hold on. Be aware of what you are doing even if you are doing something you should not be doing. Keep observing what is happening. If you don’t progress for a long time, don’t give up or move back. Stay there and just observe things, as they are, just as an on-looker. Once slowly, your mind adapts to the situation, it will automatically find a way however small it may be. Take those small baby steps, and soon you will see the impossible happen.

 Undergoing change tests your resolves and obstinacy. Sometimes, when you are making efforts, you feel exhausted, but still you want to keep moving and not give up. This may be because it hurts your self-respect or others may ridicule you. It’s true, that you should not give up, but there is no harm in taking a break, a small and refreshing one. The science of mind says that when it concentrates on something for a very long time, it loses its focus. It has to be recharged. So while making your schedules, you should keep these gaps in your schedules, which rejuvenates you, and you are able to come back harder. But mind it, keep it short and planned.

When enthusiasm meets method, intent meets analysis and hope meets honest effort, change is there for everyone to see, shining like a diamond, in the middle of our lives, flawless and beautiful, brightening our lives.